We can’t all be married to Rich Roll.
Or someone who gets excited about endurance races, fitness
…Or plant-based nutrition.
I’m speaking from experience. My husband Sam is not interested in a strict, whole foods, plant-based diet… Or regular exercise.
He loves chips… he eats them….often.
He cancelled his gym membership because he never goes.
I also know that when he goes to lunch with the guys, he’s not eating salad.
I have been a health nut my whole life. Striving to find true health, I’ve been a competitive athlete, triathlete and runner. I love setting health goals and challenging myself in ways to get braver, stronger, faster, better. I have a formal education in nutrition and I love eating plant-based.
Sam, not so much.
But Sam and I have been happily married since 1999. He’s my guy… I love him very much.
Here’s what I’ve learned, and this might just help you, if you are in the same predicament.
I love helping people recover their health, lose weight, improve their energy, live bigger, set goals and reach them….
But our loved ones don’t want us to harp on them. They don’t want another lesson on cruciferous veggies, the benefits of kale or tips on how to improve core strength.
They don’t want another black bean burger.
They want to do things their way, and we want to remain happily married, right?
So, here are some things to consider:
? Be a good example of healthy living. Thriving because of your food and lifestyle choices is the best strategy to peak someone’s curiosity and get someone to follow suit.
? If you are preparing a meal, remember if the food is good, they’ll enjoy it. If they are preparing the meal, offer to help, make something you can have, or provide a recipe if they insist on doing it solo.
? Notice and celebrate the positive lifestyle habits your spouse does live by, and participate. My husband loves humour. He watches and reads comedy blogs, funny movies and videos almost daily. He works hard on physical tasks, which are great ways to stay strong and move his body. He’s a great golfer….He values a good sleep and he knows how to work hard and play hard. He values his family and his friendships and he takes time to connect with those who are important in his life.
? Never blame your spouse for your inability to stick with the plan. No one can make you eat a donut. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard “I can’t stick with it because my husband/wife won’t change”…… This is about shifting responsibility and owning your choices, that said, support helps….
? If you have a big goal and you want support, ask. Have an honest conversation with your spouse about your plan, let them know what kind of support you need from them to get there. Let them know how important it is to you, ask for specifics: maybe they can keep junk foods at the office or encourage you to get out for that jog, or maybe even join you!
Sam is now mostly plant-based. He understands why it’s important and tries in his own way, on his terms. He is also proud and supportive of me and my mission…..
Every Sunday he prepares a plant-based meal for the family. (it was not always this way!) I smiled to myself just recently when he told me about a fund raising campaign for cardiac medical intervention, he said “they could use that money just to teach people about a plant-based diet.” Progress.
Keep on being a good example.
With love,